Who's Got the Money?

I came from a very frugal family. I can remember taking ballet classes in socks and tap class in my Sunday shoes wearing my mother's Jazzercize leotard because my parents did not want to buy ballet and tap shoes or dance clothes. As a result, when I enrolled my daughters in dance classes, they had multiple dance outfits and the best quality of dance shoes. Growing up, I did not deeply feel the lack of money, I wished for ballet shoes, but was so thankful I had dance classes. I think it is interesting that my children with dancing clothes and dance shoes have felt poor because we are not regularly going on cruises or trips to foreign countries.

I say all of this to help lay a foundation for my thoughts and feelings on money. My feelings have changed after attending many finance classes as part of my degree path. Before, I saw money as the means to get all the things I wanted. Now I carefully weigh out if I want to give up my money for the trade of the good or service. I find more often that I want my money more than I want the dinner out or new outfit. As an adult, I was anxious to provide for my children and purchase the things I wanted; now value security more than things so I value money more.

As an adult, I have also seen how money can work for you and how if you conserve money, you can multiply it and make it work for you. This has come into play as I have received a small amount of inheritance from my mother after she passed away a few years ago. I have a strong desire to use that money in such a way that it will grow and multiply. I am protective of it. I want it to be a beacon that I can refer to for decades to come to show what my mother's gift to me is and has become.

I see money as a building resource that is limited, yet what I can build with the money is limitless if I manage it correctly. The goal of obtaining money is the reason why I work and sacrifice time away from the people I love the most. I want to collect enough so that one day I will not need to be away from the people I love. 

Here are some steps that helped me to change my view of money and how I use it. I want to keep my money. I do not want to spend all this time working and not have anything to show for it. I must track where I spend my money and the amount. I need to make sure I am saving for emergencies and saving for myself in a fund that will never be touched until there is a time I can live off the interest alone. This takes discipline. To maintain this discipline, I have to keep my goals in mind and as I mentioned before weighing out each expenditure. 

I have learned that I love to give and share. When I have excess, I love to share it. Knowing this, I budget for giving, not just my tithing, but gifts as well. I find it interesting to note that most finance books and lessons talk about the value of charitable donations as a key to building wealth. I think it is not only the power and blessing from God, but also a practice of not holding on so tight. Think of it, when you are in a relationship and you are so possessive that the person can never get away from you, the first thing they will do when they can is get away from you because you are smothering them. Could money be the same way? When you value it but do not miserly, possessively keep it, you have a healthier relationship with money and it with you.

Money and the collection of it cannot be your driving force. If money is your master, you have no love or joy. My goal is to make and use my money to build a life where I can be with the people I love. They are my motivation.

So I go back to my ballet class in socks. I think my parents were on to something. They gave me the experience that I longed for. I was a dancer. They chose to keep and invest money instead of spending it all on things that in the long run are of little consequence. My mother often quoted a line that said, 'If you do not have a wolf at the door, hire one.' It is important to live beneath your means and shape your surplus into a force for good that will bless you and those you wish to serve in the future.